A few days ago, the regular hum of our household was in full effect. Scott was bathing Gianna, the boys were upstairs arguing over who was going to take the first shower and the girls were giggling in their room.
Me? I was washing dishes. I do it every night. And not a single kid bothers me because they know if they walk into the kitchen I’ll put them to work.
As I stood there, with my fancy pink gloves in the familiar bubbly hot water, I heard it.
It has been so long.
God’s voice was as clear as a bell. I was reflecting on the beautiful simplicity of the moment – the life that was buzzing around me – and I told Him how grateful I was to be in this house, with these people, at this moment.
And He smiled and said, “You’re welcome.”
It’s just been so long since I’ve prayed and felt like God heard. It was one of my most difficult springtimes. My grandfather died unexpectedly – the one we thought had many more years with us – and then the devastating blow of some hard news from people we love. While I prayed my way through those really, really hard days, I guess I had just lost my passion to pray with sincerity as the months turned to summer, then fall. Thanksgiving and the weeks following left our house sick with a myriad of strep, UTIs and stomach bugs. Then, I had six benign tumors removed. Yes, good times all around.
But, perhaps I needed to be knocked out during the holiest time of the year to be reminded of the little things. For it’s always the smallest stuff that shines God’s great big love isn’t it?
The unexpected phone call from a friend.
The husband who fills up your van with gas without telling you.
The child who whispers, “Mommy, I love you,” in your ear.
The toddler who snuggles in close and falls asleep on your chest.
The neighbor who brings you a beer and a hug because she knows you need it.
The teenager who winks and tells you dinner was awesome.
The Dominican Sister who emails out of the blue just to tell you to have a great day.
God is in all of those and millions of other places. My head knows that but it has been so long since my heart felt it.
As I placed that last dish on the drying rack, I bowed my head and decided the pity party of 2017 was officially over. 2018 has so much possibility ahead. It has sorrow and joy, it has disappointment and elation. It’s time to see the God all around me, instead of the Devil inside. I know which one wins in the end.
A wise friend recently reminded me, “We have to try harder, Kathryn. God is waiting on us to show his great mercy and love.” 2018, let’s get to it.